It only seems like yesterday when we were joining Clarkson, Hammond and May for the premiere of the third season of The Grand Tour. Now, three months later, series three is drawing to a close, with episode 14 bringing an end to the show in its present format.
Before you settle down to enjoy the last episode, join us for a grand tour of the cars you have been watching, with quotes from the presenters.
Episode 1: Motown Funk
Ford Mustang RTR Spec 3: “This is the Anthony Joshua of muscle cars. Big and brawny, but it has brains as well.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Dodge Challenger SRT Demon: “I have 840 horsepower, a massive supercharger and on the bonnet is the biggest hood scoop ever fitted to a production car… ever. NOISE! Noise in the city.” – Richard Hammond
Hennessey Exorcist Camaro ZL1: “They’ve taken a standard Camaro and they’ve given it 1,000 horsepower. Jesus Christ! I can’t even steer it. It’s idiotic, honestly.” – James May
McLaren Senna: “It stops like it’s run into a wall, it’s pressed into the road by witchcraft, it weighs the same as a bag of whippets, and it has nearly 800 horsepower on tap.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Episodes 2 and 3: Colombia Special
Jeep Wrangler: “It’s gonna be ideal for wildlife photography because it’s four-wheel-drive, so I could use it to track a snow leopard. It’s got a 4.0-litre straight-six, so I could keep up with a diving eagle. And, of course, no roof, fold-down windscreen, so a 360-degree field of fire for my camera.” – Jeremy Clarkson.
Chevrolet C/K Silverado: “It’s a full-size American pick-up that’s been made a bit bigger with a lift kit. Most importantly it’s got a proper big old 7.4-litre V8 up front in a very lazy state of tune, just churning out huge gobbets of grunt.” – Richard Hammond
Fiat Panda 4×4 Sisley: “What you need for serious off-roading is smallness and lightness. That’s what I’ve got. This is a tiny car. It weighs 780 kilograms – a quarter of what Hammond’s stupid monster truck weighs.” – James May
Episode 4: Pick up, Put Downs
“If you need to flee from government forces, you need an Amarok.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Jaguar XE SV Project 8: “How mad would you have to be to spend £150,000 on a car that was designed and built in a glorified shed in the Midlands… in about 18 months? The simple answer is: not mad at all because this car is fan-bleeding tastic.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Episode 5: An Itchy Urus
Lamborghini Urus: “Twitchy and it’s scary! It’s like I’ve been put in charge of all of the world’s physics while I’m in a phone box full of wasps.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Alpine A110: “The original 1960s version was a masterpiece. But for me, this modern reboot doesn’t quite work. Once you stretch modern legislation over 1960s design language, you end up with a sort of slightly lame tribute act.” – James May
Episode 6: Chinese Food for Thought
Mercedes-Benz S600: “If you are a Chinese businessman or business-woman, and you want a car that reflects your status, you can simply pop over to Europe and buy a Mercedes-Benz S-Class.” – James May
BMW 750 iL: “This is the BMW ‘Seven-Hundred-And-Fifty’ IL, as Q called it in the Bond film Tomorrow Never Dies.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Cadillac STS: “This is a Cadillac STS and you can shut up, because this is fitted with one of the best engines of all time: the creamy smooth 4.6-litre Northstar V8.” – Richard Hammond
NIO EP9: “It’s pretty clear that this is no Nissan Leaf. Because a Leaf doesn’t have giant head restraints designed to stop G-forces from snapping your neck during hard cornering.” – Richard Hammond
Episode 7: Well Aged Scotch
BMW M5 v Alpina B5: “The M5 is tauter, more nailed down, more on it, somehow. So on a track, make no mistake, the M5 will pull away. We’re both cats. It’s just that he’s [the M5] is a cheetah and I’m [the B5] is a lion.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Alfa Romeo GTV6: “This car is just heaven. Absolute heaven. Look at it and tell me you can think of another car anywhere on Earth for 10 grand that you’d like more than this.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Fiat X1/9: “Some cars achieve classic status simply because they’re really good. The X1/9 was good when it was designed and built first, and still is today.” – Richard Hammond
Lancia Gamma Coupe: “Rare, interesting, beautiful – those are the criteria by which I think you should judge whether or not a car is a true classic. It has to be at least two of those things to qualify. So let’s have a look at my Lancia. Well, it’s definitely beautiful. It’s a truly superb bit of styling, this. And it’s rare.” – James May
Episode 8: International Buffoons’ Vacation
Jeep Grand Cherokee Trackhawk: “Pulling this 700 horsepower 6.2-litre supercharged V8 out of a Dodge Challenger Hellcat into a Jeep off-roader might sound like it makes as much sense as fitting me with Usain Bolt’s legs.” – Richard Hammond
Episode 9: Aston, Astronauts and Angelina’s Children
Aston Martin Vantage: “This is one of those superstar cars that leave a wake of dropped jaws and phone camera flashes.” – Richard Hammond
Citroen C3 Aircross: “Faster than itself at the test track. Strong enough to pull a ship. Big enough for the entire Jolie family and a horse. And better at invading Italy than an elephant.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Chevrolet Corvette Sting Ray: “This is Neil Armstrong’s Corvette. His hands were here. He looked at the instruments like that. He touched that. Neil Armstrong! What an honour” – James May
Episode 10: The Youth Vote
Toyota Yaris GRMN: “Gazoo! It’s nice, it feels taut.” – James May
Ford Fiesta ST: “This is cracking. I love these.” – Richard Hammond
Volkswagen Polo GTI: “Volkswagen invented the hot hatchback and they’re still the best at it.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Lamborghini Countach: “This version of the Countach, the LP500, was launched in 1985, specifically to put the Testarossa back in its box.” – Richard Hammond
Ferrari Testarossa: “The Ferrari Testarossa was excess on wheels. Be it looks, attitude, or even size. It was unquestionably the only car that could star in Miami Vice.” – James May
Episode 11: Sea to Unsalty Sea
Aston Martin DBS: “My Aston has been delivered with Birmingham spec.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Bentley Continental GT: “Does Liberace pop up out of the centre console and play the piano for you?” – James May
BMW M850i: “This is like Elton John’s greatest hits without Your Song or Tiny Dancer on it.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Episode 12: Legends and Luggage
Porsche 917: “Even if you have no interest in motorsport, you’ll most likely recognise this machine because it’s quite possibly the most iconic racing car ever created.” – James May
Lancia Delta Futurista: “It is a bloody brilliant car, this. Yes, I like this.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Lancia Stratos: “If I was going to spurt big lumps of money on an update classic Lancia, I’d spurt them on the most classic Lancia of them all… the Stratos.” – Jeremy Clarkson
Episode 13: Survival of the Fattest
John: “He’s been incredible. Even though we built it in the middle of a field in the dust, it has been unutterably reliable. If you’re going on an expedition and you’re absolutely dependent on your car for your life… get a John.” – James May
Episode 14: Funeral for a Ford
In the final episode of the series, Clarkson, Hammond and May take a look at the history of the medium-sized Ford saloon, starting with the Ford Cortina…
Then the Ford Sierra, before celebrating the life and times of the Ford Mondeo. “The history lesson ends with a touching memorial service to this totem of British life,” says the press material.
Speaking of memorial services, it looks like we’ll need to say on a fond farewell to this Toyota Picnic.
And on that bombshell
And on that bombshell, it’s time to end the gallery. Thanks for the laughs, chaps.
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